The Tacit Conviction of Truth
Admittedly, I cheated, peering over my husband’s shoulder while he thought I slept. The first few words, totally him, that rebellious rocker him, not the engineer him. A total scratch. But then, six perfect letters appeared. That was it.
Known.
A few years later, the crowd eagerly anticipated their idol’s entrance while I, instead, anxiously awaited. Awaited the presence of a man I had never met, let alone seen in person, yet upon whom I had based so many futures. And once the fellow next to me heard why I was there, and henceforth pointed out the perhaps insanity of my decision that morning long ago, the excitement was replaced by nerves. And doubt. And pre-regret. And a silent yet hysterical examination of every major prior life choice, each with its accompanying swirl of doubt and assurance, complexity and beauty. A cacophony now echoing throughout the conclave of my mind.
Thoughts.
He finally emerged. He spoke. He sang. He taught. He enraptured. He made the known thoughts ….
Unknown.
We began to ride his wave, immersed in the story of the perfect spring sunrise, a dawn akin to the one where this chapter begins. We were neither here nor there, gliding through majestic reverberations of wisdom and art, philosophy and life. Blissfully lost in the present moment.
Unthoughts.
“All the thoughts you never see, you are always thinking. Brain is wide, the brain is deep. Oh, are you sinking? Feel the path of every day. Which road you taking? Breathing hard and making hay. Yeah, this is living….. See the path cut by the moon for you to walk on. See the waves on distant shores awaiting you to ride on…..”
Behind every life force there is an equal, if not stronger, hidden force. The tide beneath the wave. The bud inside the branch. The soul within the being. That mystic element that weaves our existence, one invisible, tangible, gust of wind at a time.
Unknown.
The element perceived when there is nothing actually there to perceive, often a forced redirection from the visible to the invisible. The palpable to the mystic. The corporeal to the ephemeral.
Unthoughts Known.
We all know - when you know, you know. With or without the data, in-line or opposed to it. But what about when we think we do not know, or should not know, or cannot know, but make a move anyways?
Are we succumbing or superseding?
It made no literal, practical sense at all, but in a zeptosecond, the decision was made. That last word on the list was the one. The Unthought Known decided for me, or maybe me for it.
As I lay in that same bed this morning, husband, kid, and birds chirping away, I pondered if perhaps this enigmatic nature of life is real life itself. The invisible veracity that moves us, inside and out. The tacit conviction of truth.
Or in the voice of Eddie Vedder…..